A few years ago I attended a seminar by Dr. Robert Glover on how to lose my Mr. Nice Guy behaviors. A lot of men suffer from this way of thinking and being in the world. It’s incredibly damaging to all concerned.
In that weekend seminar I connected with another man who happened to live close to me. We got together for a couple of hikes and meals and wound up forming a good friendship. We’ve been friends ever since.
It’s been great to see the changes we have both made in our lives. A couple of years ago, he enrolled in graduate school and started working on getting an advanced degree in Education. The work was difficult for him. He was holding down a full-time job in education as well as going to school nights and weekends.
Bob sucked it up and stuck it out. He graduated with good grades and recently was offered and he accepted a much better position as an assistant principal here in Seattle.
It’s amazing to see the progress he has made. He’s dating again but in a much more relaxed, less anxious, way. He’s a man who knows his values and says what’s on his mind. People are free to be themselves around him.
I am happy for my friend. I’m enjoying seeing him making progress on his goals without becoming overly attached to outcomes. That is real freedom.